![]() ![]() I'm always afraid I'll make the wrong decision and fuck everything up, that I'll disappoint the people I care about and trap myself in a bad situation that I can't escape. As a 19 yr old fresh out of high school, not knowing what I want in life, I struggle with indecisiveness. She found a way to break free of their expectations while still holding herself to her own personal standards, and when indecisiveness and fear of failure reared their ugly heads, instead of breaking down under pressure as is so easy to do, she sought to expand her horizons, learn more about both herself and the world she lives in, and ultimately make a serious effort to come to her own conclusions despite her own fears and inhibitions. Adults tend to expect results and ignore the effort it takes for us to reach the goals they forcefully impose on us. I know what it's like to be an overachiever, to be burdened with extremely high expectations from everyone around you, yet none of them offering any form of assistance when it's clear that you're struggling. I wish I'd handled my lot in life that well. She handles her situation with a certain grace, remaining calm in the most dire of situations and doing what she believes is right even when it's not easy for her, even when it scares her. ![]() ![]() My personal experience irl mirrors hers, but she embodies what I wish I could be and the things I wish I'd done. And she goes out of her way to seek your assistance in improving herself and growing as a person in multiple facets of her life. She's so modest without being self-depricating and she acknowledges the parts of herself that are lacking, whether it be her complacency in doing what the adults tell her at the very beginning of her tenure in game, or her general lack of social experience and inability to understand people her own age. She genuinely cares for her friends and will do whatever it takes to help them and keep them safe, even if they themselves don't realize it (her slapping Eiko to her senses). She has an air of strength and confidence about her that I really admire, and she truly lives up to her epithet of Queen, and yet she displays a kind gentleness to those around her, and remains modest never seeing herself as perfect or even particularly amazing. She's already such an amazing and capable person when we meet her, extremely intelligent, strong-willed, level headed, and ultimately an all around balanced force both inside and outside of combat. If not, I'm sure someone will be interested. And I assume you want well thought out, deep responses otherwise you wouldn't have asked. This is gonna be a really really extremely long rant, so I apologize in advance, but I have strong deeply rooted feelings on this very topic. ![]()
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